Because you’ll probably be asked one of these questions at some point, and you’ll want to have answers of this calibre ready.
Anti-choice activists forget that to many of us, a fetus is a potential child like the countless potential children we have said “no” to by abstaining from sex or using birth control. For me and my husband, who see it this way, it would have violated our moral values to carry forward a fetus infested with parasites, as in our first pregnancy, or one with knowable genetic defects, which we ruled out in the second. Would we have loved and cared for a baby born blind or a child who got injured along the way? Of course! What a bizarre and insulting question! Fencing my yard and teaching my kid not to play in traffic doesn’t mean I would abandon her if she were to get hit by a car.
Also, if you’re thinking of getting an abortion, I recommend doing it loud and proud.
I do not want to invalidate the feelings of fear, or ambivalence, or sadness, or regret, or deep psychological pain that many women have surrounding their own abortions. Those reactions belong to the women who feel them, as much as my gratitude belongs to me. However, I ache for women who feel shame after having an abortion, because I think shame is a dangerous and counterproductive emotion, and I believe that shame is almost always a product of social conditioning. I’m telling you my story plainly, proudly, flippantly even, because we have all been brainwashed to believe that the absence of negative emotions around having an abortion is the mark of an emotionally bankrupt person. It’s not. I have a good heart and my abortion made me happy. It’s perfectly reasonable to feel happy that you were not forced to become a mother